


I'm Not Getting Better

by evanderblake



Series: The Angst Series [1]
Category: Game Grumps
Genre: Angst, Fighting, Infidelity, M/M, One-Shot, Violence, Whump, break-up, patient!Arin, psycho!AU, psychologist!Dan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-25
Updated: 2018-03-25
Packaged: 2019-04-08 00:39:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,067
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14093226
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/evanderblake/pseuds/evanderblake
Summary: Based on the prompts, "Doesn't my love mean anything?" and, "The worst part is that I loved you anyways."Part of the Angst Prompt Series I did on Tumblr!





	I'm Not Getting Better

Something was about to go wrong.

Dan knew that the minute he opened his goddamn mouth.

There was a sharp intake of breath before a deafening slap. He fell backward against a bookshelf in the office, taking a medical dictionary down with him as he hit the thin, scratchy carpet. A hot, white handprint was left across Dan’s face. It felt as though he had been kissed by the sun, or that he had taken a nap on an oven burner. And it stung. Terribly.

Tears pricked his eyes, and a hand flew up to cover his mouth, preventing the string of curse words he wanted to shout at him. He couldn’t do that. Not to a patient.

Dan’s last words hung in the air like smog. You can’t keep doing this to me.

And then he watched Arin’s façade break apart piece by piece. First, the realization in his eyes, then the slow downturn of his smile into a sneer. He was glowering at Dan, and his eyes were dark, ominous. The last thing Dan heard was a sort of snarl before Arin’s hand connected with his cheek.

“You selfish cunt!” he screamed, towering over Dan. “This isn’t about you! You think I’m not broken up over this? It’s killing me, Dan! I have to sleep next to her every night! I have to lie to her and pretend that I love her! That I don’t love you! That I’m getting better. Guess what, Dan? I’m not getting better. That’s real fuckin’ obvious now, isn’t it?”

Dan pushed closer to the bookshelf, kicking desperately at the carpet as he prayed to whatever god was out there that he could vanish, that he could turn invisible, that Arin wouldn’t kill him. That his receptionist would hear his voice and come to his rescue. That Arin would snap out of it. It was wishful thinking… but god, did he hope something would stop him.

He could try reasoning. Guilt-tripping him. Trying to trigger something that would make him realize his actions.

“Doesn’t my love mean anything to you?” Dan screamed back at him. “I’ve done nothing but try to help you since day fucking one, and you’re trying to blame this all on me? News flash, asshole: you’re the one that fell in love with me!”

Arin stepped back, and Dan saw a tear drip from his widening eyes. For a split second, there was hope that this would stop. That Dan wasn’t going to be cut down in his own office.

And then the anger came right back, replacing every other emotion in his body. He looked as though he might combust, that lasers might spontaneously shoot from his eyes. He braced himself.

“I’m the one at fault here? I thought I was mentally-ill? That I was society’s disgrace? Isn’t that what you said? You said I was something that everyone wanted to look away from! That no one wanted to see me! What about you Dan? You don’t want to see me, do you?” Arin was shaking with rage, the anger coursing through his veins like a disease. “You know what Dan? Fuck you. Fuck this! You promised me that Suzy would never know. That all she would see was me getting better! And now… I’m not… getting better,” he said, his voice dropping to a whisper as he stepped back. “Why am I not getting better? I thought… I was doing okay finally. That you had healed me.”

The wave emotions that traveled through him was enough to give Dan whiplash. As soon as those words were out of his mouth, he was stepping closer, crouching down and balling his hands into fists. Dan flinched at his too-quick, unnatural movements. It reminded him of how someone walks in a movie when they’re possessed. It made his stomach flip. He had never feared for his life before, but that changed in the blink of an eye.

Arin raised a hand, preparing to slap Dan once more. “You fucked me over, didn’t you? This was all part of your plan! You get to fuck me, pretend that we’re a happy couple, that I’m not already in a relationship! You get paid every time I come to see you. Tell me! I’m just an object to you, aren’t I?”

He was too scared to speak, afraid that no matter what he said he would just enrage him further. And so he sat there, staring up into Arin’s eyes, his pupils blown wide with adrenaline and fury.

“Tell me!” Arin cried, the pure agony in his voice was enough to shatter Dan’s heart.

“You weren’t.. you weren’t an object to me. I loved you, Arin,” he whispered, scooting further against the bookshelf.

“That’s… that’s not good enough.” This was a flat statement, almost no emotion in his voice, but it rang in Dan’s ears as though he’d screamed it right next to him.

“I know you used me. I could tell. You only wanted me… when it was convenient. When Barry wasn’t home. You were… ashamed of me.”

“Arin you know that’s not—”

“You wanna know the worst part, Dan?” Arin interrupted, and he flung his arm, back-handing Dan. “The worst part was I knew all that, and I loved you anyway. And look where the fuck we are now, huh?!”

Dan’s hand covered the spot where Arin had hit him… again. It burned just as hot as it did before, and he could tell it was starting to bruise. Hot, angry tears streamed down his cheeks, and he knew that this would be the end of everything. This would be the last time he saw Arin. The last time Arin visited his office. The last conversation they would have.

Dan pushed himself off the floor, standing on wobbling legs that struggled to support him.

“Get out of my office, Arin. Before I do something that could jeopardize my career.”

Arin scoffed. “You jeopardized your career when you decided you wanted to fuck me over in every goddamn way you could.” Pushing Dan aside, Arin stormed out of the office, his rage consuming him entirely.

Dan hoped Suzy would have enough sense to leave him.

He hoped she wouldn’t be treated this way.

Dan wept helplessly as he fell onto the couch in his office.

The speaker at his desk rang. “Doctor Avidan, your 12:30 patient is here.”


End file.
